Private Outdoor Sanctuaries: or To Moat, or Not To Moat

Let’s talk about how to enjoy our gardens and patios in privacy for meditation, journaling, hiding from out significant other, napping … We all need a little relief every now and then to help us deal with the stresses of our ever increasing chaotic lives. But how can we do this when we share our spaces with roommates, kids, significant others and other family members and pets and/or have nosy neighbors who insist on “being neighborly” at the most inopportune moments?

In my first book, “Designing the Life of Your Dreams from the Outside In,” I described three ways to create a PERSONAL sanctuary to escape life’s every day hassles. Creating an inner sanctuary (i.e. your happy place) and then creating a space within your home for a personal sanctuary (i.e. in the bath or in your bedroom) were detailed. The final place you can create a sanctuary is in any outdoor space (i.e. a garden, patio, and balcony) where you can find some quiet and privacy.

***A sanctuary, by definition, should transport you to another place and time to relax and recharge your batteries.***

In creating your outdoor sanctuary, you will use the same design principles detailed in previous articles: layered lighting, comfortable furniture (i.e. hammock-this is a necessity for me!!), sound (fountain, wind chimes, hidden speakers for music, nature) and accessories that bring you joy (gnome/fairy figurines, statues, flowers). The rule, which shall be repeated (probably ad nauseum), is that you should surround yourself with things that you love and serve a purpose in your life. If you have items displayed outside that are rusted, broken or just thrown behind the garage because you have no other place else to put it-fix it or get rid of it. It is serving no purpose other than to make you angry (not good Feng Shui!!). Your sanctuary should be making you happy-not stress you out.

My outdoor sanctuary is a private corner of my L-shaped yard. Here, I have my hammock set up by a couple of birdfeeders, bird bath and the mutant sunflowers (mine grow over 10” and spread out) that grow in this corner. One of my dogs (Libby) plants herself under the hammock and the other one (Ossie) stalks chipmunks in the sunflower forest. Here I’m hidden on one side by the garage, while the sunflower forest, trees and fence offer privacy on the other sides. It is here that I read, write this column and sometimes nap while listening to the birds. I always feel refreshed after time spent in my sanctuary.

***Being outside in Mother Nature is a natural, inexpensive form of Prozac***

Again an excerpt from my book, “If you are truly motivated, and have a bit of a green thumb, you can create a healing garden or a Zen garden as your personal sanctuary. Many hospitals and hospices are incorporating healing gardens on their grounds for their patients, patient’s family and staff to use. When creating these spaces, remember to incorporate all elements into the design-a water feature is key. It can be a fountain or a small pond that can also help to mask unwanted sounds. A comfortable place to sit, whether it’s a bench, chair or the ground, will add to the experience and help if you will be sitting for long periods in meditation.

Romy Rawlings states in her book, Healing Gardens, “We should learn to think of … (gardens) … as a haven where we can be embraced by the natural world.” Wow, that puts it in to perspective. Rawlings goes on to say that “the garden is a perfect place for self expression, a place where you can be creative, developing aspects of your self that may be denied elsewhere in your life.” You can easily add color and humor to a garden through your flower/plant choices and what you choose to accent your garden with. Do you have gnomes, angels or butterfly figurines placed throughout? Let your personality shine.

***To moat or not to moat… that is the question … - D. Radaj***

Privacy from the aforementioned neighbors is usually the biggest complaint I hear from clients when creating outdoor sanctuaries. My first suggestion is always to check with your city and zoning ordinances to see if putting in a moat is feasible. It’s usually not-and I am usually joking when I suggest that, no matter how irritating the offending neighbor is. However, you can install a really large water feature between your homes to symbolize a moat. Water features are a wonderful addition to any outdoor space. In Feng Shui terms, a water feature placed in the front of your home (or office building) is wonderful for your Career Area. Think of large McMansions or office complexes; a fountain is usually placed right in front! (They are “Feng Shui-ing” and they might not even know it!). Water features can be placed and include the following:

1. A bird bath counts as a water feature AND brings the activity and energy of birds and other wildlife.
2. A pond with or without fish-make sure it is well-maintained however so it doesn’t become stagnant and a mosquito breeding ground (not good Feng Shui!). You can install a pond in a weekend and purchase the parts at your local home improvement store.
3. A fountain also works, just make sure it is size appropriate for the space. The sound of moving water is very relaxing and calming, and therefore perfect for a sanctuary.

OK-since moats are off the table as an option, how about a fence? If you don’t have an existing fence, and installing one isn’t an option or in the budget, again-check with your city council for zoning ordinances, consider these options:

1. Plant arborvitaes that will create a “natural” fence and block offending views, create homes for wildlife, and make a windbreak (or the dreaded 4-letter word…snow) to help protect your yard.
2. Installing a pergola in your yard will literally create an outside room for you to hide out in. You can order these and assemble them yourself if your handy, or you can work with your favorite designer/architect/contractor and design your own.

Finding time to visit your personal sanctuary, whether it’s your inner, physical or outer sanctuary is critical in balancing the demands your life places upon you, or that you place upon it. You must take the time to recharge by getting a good night’s sleep, having some alone time or time to just “be.” Get lost in a daydream or unleash your inner Picasso. This time is as essential to your wellbeing as food, water, and breathing is in maintaining a healthy body, mind and spirit.