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GREEN HOME SHOW #23: Healthy Lifestyle: Part 2 Skit and Audience Going Green Questions
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Overall Segment #2 – 12:00
On Location With Cletus – 4:00 Sponsored by: Energy Services Group
Professor Cletus T. Beaumont goes to an organic farm
Today Professor Cletus T. Beaumont is traveling the back roads of Cecil County in search of local organic farms and produce. Of course as usual, he's been marking the sides of the road where unfortunate animals have become roadside fatalities in case his search for sustenance from an organic and local source cannot be found. I think our wandering hero has discovered a produce stand at an organic farm, practically in his own backyard.
Doug: Professor, can you hear me alright? Are you there professor?
Cletus: Yes Doug, I can hear ya just fine. I'm here at Ed Patterson’s Organic and Free-Range Chicken Farm (Race Track). I was cruisin’ the back roads over here in Calvert, Maryland when I came around the corner and saw all these chickens runnin’ around inside this big cage. Why there’s enough room in there for the chickens to run around and do what chickens do, which is to jump and squawk and make eggs. You know it didn't take much gas to get here and I've learnd there’re more places just like this one right around the corner from where I live. Now I figure if I buy my chickens and my eggs from this farmer, I’ll put a lot less carbon in the atmosphere and use less gasoline and precious oil than the trucks have to use in order to bring these products to my local grocery store. And the money I spend goes into the local economy… in fact, right here in Ed’s pocket.
Doug: That sounds great professor. I like that the money stays in the local economy, but I especially like reducing carbon emissions because the food doesn’t have to be hauled from Florida or California. I would imagine it’s probably fresher too!
PCTB: Oh absolutely! It doesn’t get any fresher than this. Most of the produce I’m lookin’ at right now was picked this mornin’!
Doug: Can you tell me professor, what type of produce is grown in this area and what we can expect to buy here in your backyard?
Professor Cletus: I sure can Doug, but first I got to tell you, there are so many chickens here runnin’ around loose that I’m concerned. I mean, what if some of these chickens was to get too close to the road or a big wind came along picked them up and pushed them towards the road, and cars was coming from every whicha-way? Well we could have a veritable chicken roadside cataclysm! And I’d hate to see so much good chicken go to waste. These chickens aren't in cages, aren't subjected 24-hour lighting, they’re not shipped in little boxes and they’re healthy! They're treated humanely and not subjected to any growth hormones or anything in their feed that could affect the humans that are consumin’ them. You know the problem isn't with how many chickens are bein’ raised by humans. If we used the same energy and grains we feed to the chickens and use it to feed people, we’d feed a lot more people. ‘Cept that no one can turn down a tasty chicken meal, like chicken and dumplin’s, chicken cacciatore, chicken parmagiana, chicken francaise, chicken tetrazini, roasted chicken, fried chicken, broiled chicken, braised chicken, chicken salad, chicken casserole, buffalo chicken wings, rotisserie chicken, chicken fingers, and of course the tastiest chicken of all, Professor Cletus T. Beaumont's roadside, engine block barbecued chicken legs. You know, those other guys might use the wings, but I like to use the legs. There’s a lot more meat on ‘em because as chickens don't fly much, the legs do all the work...
Doug: That all sounds very, very tasty professor, but could you please tell me what kind of produce is for sale at this farm?
PCTB: You know Doug, I would tell you… I surely would, ‘cept I chased one of those chickens into the corn maze they have here and I can’t seem to get my hands on the little bugger. I feel like Rocky from the first movie.
Doug: Well look at the bright side professor, when you’re done you’ll be able to eat lightning and crap thunder.
PCTB: I think I’m lost too. I can’t seem to remember the way out. And on top of it, every time I get close to the chicken, I get these maze creatures jumpin’ out and scaring bejesus out of me every 20 or 30 feet. I hope they keep a defibrillator handy. One more mummy or werewolf and I may just have a heart attack.
Doug: I’ll make you a deal Professor, we’ll send someone out right now to find you if you will just answer the question about the types of produce available there.
PCTB: Well I guess I could answer that while I’m chasin’ this blasted chicken. Good Lord, it’s worse than a greased pig! I will tell ya, I saw some amazin’ tomatoes, fresh cucumbers, several types of zucchini, zucchini Bread, potatoes, several different types of onions, spaghetti squash, kale, asparagus everywhere, broccoli out the wazoo, peas, all types of beans, carrots, watermelon, cantaloupe, melons, corn, corn and awfully good corn. And they do all of this organically, which means no nasty chemical fertilizers and such. You know Doug there’s also a new winery just around the corner and they are growing several different kinds of grapes. I'm telling you this local wine is good, why do you I’m having such a tough time with the chicken? I had a glass of cabernet, some pinot grigio, a little chardonnay and a couple sips of….
Doug: Thank you Professor… thank you very much. We’ll talk to you in a couple of weeks from the San Francisco GreenFest.
Listener Letters – 5:00 Sponsored by: CMI Electric
Check the Radio Show Segments on GREENandSAVE.com for the ANSWERS!
It’s time for Listener Letters. What do we have Doug?
1.Our first letter comes from Jan Brady of Wilmington. Jan asks: Is there such a thing as green food?
2.Our next question is from Ted Baxter of Northeast, MD. Ted says: I’ve read that they’re making clothes out of recycled plastic water and soda bottles. Is this true?
3.Our last letter is from Shirley Feeney of Bear. Shirley wants to know: What’s being done in the way of green
Thanks to CMI Electric for sponsoring this weeks Listener Letters. Remember, we’ll answer your questions too.
